I’ve been there. My folks were always on me to groom myself and wear underpants. What am I, the pope?

I never loved you. You lived before you met me?! Well, thanks to the Internet, I’m now bored with sex. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence? That could be ‘my’ beautiful soul sitting naked on a couch. If I could just learn to play this stupid thing.

Shut up and get to the point! What kind of a father would I be if I said no? Hey, you add a one and two zeros to that or we walk! All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring to business school!

How much did you make me?

Um, is this the boring, peaceful kind of taking to the streets? Fry, you can’t just sit here in the dark listening to classical music. Yes, I saw. You were doing well, until everyone died. Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused.

1. You wouldn’t. Ask anyway!
2. Oh, how I wish I could believe or understand that! There’s only one reasonable course of action now: kill Flexo!
3. Large bet on myself in round one.

Yeah. Give a little credit to our public schools.

A true inspiration for the children. Hello Morbo, how’s the family? Now Fry, it’s been a few years since medical school, so remind me. Disemboweling in your species: fatal or non-fatal? Enough about your promiscuous mother, Hermes! We have bigger problems.

• You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from intestinal parasites?
• Take me to your leader!
• And remember, don’t do anything that affects anything, unless it turns out you were supposed to, in which case, for the love of God, don’t not do it!

It doesn’t look so shiny to me. You can see how I lived before I met you. It’s a T. It goes “tuh”. Daddy Bender, we’re hungry. Too much work. Let’s burn it and say we dumped it in the sewer. Professor, make a woman out of me.

No, she’ll probably make me do it. Five hours? Aw, man! Couldn’t you just get me the death penalty? OK, if everyone’s finished being stupid. Incidentally, you have a dime up your nose. I’m Santa Claus!

You won’t have time for sleeping, soldier, not with all the bed making you’ll be doing. Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.” With gusto. For the last time, I don’t like lilacs! Your ‘first’ wife was the one who liked lilacs!

Why not indeed! Yeah, and if you were the pope they’d be all, “Straighten your pope hat.” And “Put on your good vestments.” Daddy Bender, we’re hungry. Leela, are you alright? You got wanged on the head.

Stop it, stop it. It’s fine. I will ‘destroy’ you! Oh, how I wish I could believe or understand that! There’s only one reasonable course of action now: kill Flexo! Who said that? SURE you can die! You want to die?!

Guess again. In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. Ask her how her day was. Yeah, lots of people did. Soothe us with sweet lies.

Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way? Bender, you risked your life to save me! I love you, buddy! Well I’da done better, but it’s plum hard pleading a case while awaiting trial for that there incompetence.

Oh yeah, good luck with that. What are their names? So, how ’bout them Knicks? Bender, I didn’t know you liked cooking. That’s so cute.

Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way? Too much work. Let’s burn it and say we dumped it in the sewer. It’s a T. It goes “tuh”. Eeeee! Now say “nuclear wessels”! These old Doomsday Devices are dangerously unstable. I’ll rest easier not knowing where they are.

I saw you with those two “ladies of the evening” at Elzars. Explain that. In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. Bender, hurry! This fuel’s expensive! Also, we’re dying! Oh no! The professor will hit me! But if Zoidberg ‘fixes’ it… then perhaps gifts!

Good man. Nixon’s pro-war and pro-family. I don’t ‘need’ to drink. I can quit anytime I want! Can we have Bender Burgers again? Anyhoo, your net-suits will allow you to experience Fry’s worm infested bowels as if you were actually wriggling through them.