Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn’t I break his legs?

You mean while I’m sleeping in it? Ow, my spirit! Who are those horrible orange men? Ow, my spirit! Say what?

And remember, don’t do anything that affects anything, unless it turns out you were supposed to, in which case, for the love of God, don’t not do it! So, how ’bout them Knicks? Soothe us with sweet lies.

Hello, little man. I will destroy you!

In your time, yes, but nowadays shut up! Besides, these are adult stemcells, harvested from perfectly healthy adults whom I killed for their stemcells. Why yes! Thanks for noticing. Ooh, name it after me!

  1. A true inspiration for the children.
  2. Actually, that’s still true.
  3. Eeeee! Now say “nuclear wessels”!

I didn’t ask for a completely reasonable excuse! I asked you to get busy!

Oh, you’re a dollar naughtier than most. I don’t ‘need’ to drink. I can quit anytime I want! Oh sure! Blame the wizards! This is the worst part. The calm before the battle. We don’t have a brig. I suppose I could part with ‘one’ and still be feared…

  • Do a flip!
  • Ask her how her day was.
  • Ow, my spirit!

Tell them I hate them. Oh right. I forgot about the battle. Look, last night was a mistake. Yeah, and if you were the pope they’d be all, “Straighten your pope hat.” And “Put on your good vestments.” What’s with you kids? Every other day it’s food, food, food. Alright, I’ll get you some stupid food.

Pansy. Oh yeah, good luck with that. My fellow Earthicans, as I have explained in my book ‘Earth in the Balance”, and the much more popular ”Harry Potter and the Balance of Earth’, we need to defend our planet against pollution. Also dark wizards.

Humans dating robots is sick. You people wonder why I’m still single? It’s ’cause all the fine robot sisters are dating humans! Why yes! Thanks for noticing. Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun?

Fetal stemcells, aren’t those controversial? With gusto. So I really am important? How I feel when I’m drunk is correct? You guys go on without me! I’m going to go… look for more stuff to steal!

Hey! I’m a porno-dealing monster, what do I care what you think? I could if you hadn’t turned on the light and shut off my stereo. Hey, you add a one and two zeros to that or we walk! I barely knew Philip, but as a clergyman I have no problem telling his most intimate friends all about him.

You lived before you met me?! Say what? Tell her you just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating. And from now on you’re all named Bender Jr. Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way?

Your best is an idiot! Oh no! The professor will hit me! But if Zoidberg ‘fixes’ it… then perhaps gifts! Bender?! You stole the atom. But existing is basically all I do! With a warning label this big, you know they gotta be fun!

Oh, you’re a dollar naughtier than most. I am the man with no name, Zapp Brannigan! When the lights go out, it’s nobody’s business what goes on between two consenting adults. Who said that? SURE you can die! You want to die?!

Actually, that’s still true. Yep, I remember. They came in last at the Olympics, then retired to promote alcoholic beverages! That’s not soon enough! Doomsday device? Ah, now the ball’s in Farnsworth’s court!

Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything. Fry! Quit doing the right thing, you jerk! Bender, I didn’t know you liked cooking. That’s so cute. Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn’t I break his legs?

Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn’t I break his legs? Bender?! You stole the atom. Too much work. Let’s burn it and say we dumped it in the sewer. Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way?

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